1. We demand further demands.
2. We demand the immediate denial of plausibility.
3. We demand that all reputed organised crime figures appear on postage stamps.
4. We demand that the Central Intelligence Agency be replaced with a euphemism.
5. We demand that the Catholic Church and the World Wrestling Federation merge and elect a new heavyweight champion.
6. We demand that the Protestant Church combine with McDonalds: hereafter doing business as The United Church of Saturated Fat.
7. We demand common sense declare moral bankruptcy.
8. We demand the law of gravity be repealed and this repeal be applied retroactively.
9. We demand the Internal Revenue and Home Shopping Services unite and be renamed the National Security State.
10. We further demand further demands.